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I'm looking for someone to carve and slide into my heart

I love 2 sk8 and if I can find a girl who is down for a short freaky Mormon like me, that would be rad like my love for minions

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National heritageCanadian
Height173 cm
Eye ColorDepends on my mood
Hair ColorBrown
Facial HairNone
Best featureButt
Body ArtBranded, Inked all over, Secret piercings, Strategically placed tattoo, Other piercings
Health ConditionAIDS / HIV
My AttractivenessUnattractive


Have PetsRodent, I own a farm

Education & Employment

EducationHigh school Diploma - GED or equivalent
Employment StatusStudent
Annual incomeSeeking support
Job TitleMormon Over Lord

Leisure & Fun

TV preferencesCartoons, Soaps
Favorite TV showsBBW Mud Wrestling
Favorite movies typesRomance, Horror, I'm a movie actor
Favorite moviesThe Ones with the little yellow minions
Anything with Donald Trump
Music typesCountry, Rap, Vacuum cleaner noises, Reggae, Gospel
Favorite artistsEli Christenson
Reading selectionNews, Mystery, Poetry, Religious, I'm an author
Favorite booksThe Book of Mormon
Idea of funfalling on my face because I'm terrible at longboarding
Reading dat Holy Book
Cleaning my special Mormon underwear
HobbiesTV, Internet, Clubbing, bar Hopping, Dancing, Photography, Religion, spirituality, Gambling


SmokerSmoke heavily (10+ a day)
DrinkingDon't drink
Social behaviorDark
Friends describe asA troll
In High School I was a(n)Bully
Sense of humorDry / sarcastic
My great timePartying, Staying at home, Playing dress-up
Always wanted to tryTo play hide and seek with myself


Political viewsSocialist
Goal in lifeTo become an imaginary Dragon

Looking For

Must haveOddities, Money, Power
Look for in a partner200 +
Hairy as can be
I basically want a Sasquatch that's been put in a car compactor
On the first dateTake her out for a nice seafood dinner
And never call her again