New here? Sign Up Have an account?

I'm cooler than ur gf

Super cool, skater girl, cooler than ur gf, like burgers, hate tomatoes

Sign Up 100% FREE to Get In Touch

Join Free Now

My Christian Preferences

Which Church were you raised in?Assembly of God, Interdenominational, Lutheran, Methodist
How often do you attend church?Many times a year
What's the name of the church or ministry which you attend?Suck it Mom

Appearance

EthnicityCaucasian / White
National heritageAlbanian
BuildVoluptuous
Height4' 11" (150 cm) or shorter
Eye ColorGreen
Hair ColorBlonde
Hair LengthWaist length
Best featureBelly Button
Body ArtBelly button ring, Branded, Fanged, Inked all over, None, Pierced... but only ear(s), Secret piercings, Scarred, Strategically placed tattoo, Visible tattoo, Other, Other piercings
Health ConditionNo special Health Conditions
My AttractivenessVery attractive

Situation

Relationship StatusWidowed
Has childrenChildren don't live with me
Wants kidsNot sure
Housing SituationIt gets a bit crazy sometimes
Living ArrangementsWith pet(s)
Wants to RelocateMaybe
Have PetsCat, Dog, Bird, Exotic animal, Fish, Gerbil or guinea pig, Horse, Reptile, Rodent, Other, I own a farm
Has a carYes

Education & Employment

EducationUniversity Doctorate
SpecialtyArt / Music / Literature
Employment StatusRetired
Annual income$2,500,000 +
Job TitleUr mom

Leisure & Fun

TV preferencesNews, Cartoons, Documentaries, Dramas, Situation comedies, Instructional, Movies, I don't like TV, I wish I had a TV, Sports, Reality shows, Soaps, Re-runs, Science fiction
Favorite TV showsThat 70s show 420, Big Bang theory, my 600-lb life, cupcake wars, deal or no deal, tiny house living, deadliest catch, dog whisperer, sex sent me to the er, spongebob, the guy on that show
Favorite movies typesAction, Science fiction, Comedy, Romance, Drama, Documentary, Family, Animation, Horror, Thriller, I don't like movies, I'm a movie actor, Adult
Favorite moviesNight at the Museum, the new spongebob square pants movie, Wreck-It Ralph, Pineapple Express, Lordes of Dogtown, anything with Will Farrel
Music typesCountry, Rap, Rock, Metal, Electronic, Pop, Classical, Vacuum cleaner noises, I don't like music, I'm a recording artist, Blues, Jazz, Industrial, Latin, New age, Ambient, Dance, Soul, Reggae, Gospel, Folk, Punk
Favorite artistsJesus take the Wheel, Bob Marley, Kim Ks new album, Oops I Did It Again, Sublime, Red HotSpicy Chilli Peppers, Just the Way You Are, Avril Levigne
Reading selectionNews, Ancient, Anthology, Auto-biography, Biography, Business, Classic, Comic, Computers, Fantasy, Fiction, Health, History, Home & Garden, Horror, Humor, Instructional, Mathematics, Music, Mystery, Nature, Philosophy, Political, Reference, Poetry, Religious, Satire, Science, Science fiction, Sports, Technical, I don't like reading, I'm an author
Favorite booksThe Fault in our Stars, If You give a Mouse a Cookie, Bridge to Terrabithia, Harry Potter, Mother GooSe Rhymes, I write fanfic on Harry Styles
Idea of funLarping, Coldplay, long walks on the beach(;, chipotle, throwing rocks at cars, skateboarding, eating shaved ice, sharpening pencils, putting glue in places it shouldn't be, painting open toed shoes, pretending to be a cat, dancing in my room alone
HobbiesExercising, Arts & Crafts, Sports, Reading, Learning, Music, TV, Movies, Internet, Games, Clubbing, bar Hopping, Dancing, Family, Dining, Photography, Religion, spirituality, Theater, Travel, Cooking, Gardening, Cars, Camping, Fishing, Playing cards, Gambling, Computers, Shopping, Motorcycles, Hunting

Personality

SmokerSmoke heavily (10+ a day)
DrinkingOne or two
Social behaviorFire starter
Friends describe asA troll
In High School I was a(n)Outcast
Sense of humorI never laugh
My great timeHanging out with friends, Partying, Going shopping, Staying at home, Trying new things, The movies, Relaxing, Sleeping, Clubbing / bars, Drinking, Extreme sports, Reading a book, Going to a casino, Playing dress-up, Playing video games, TV, Going to a concert, Going to a museum
Always wanted to tryAnal, getting dressed with the lights off, heart shaped pancakes, shaving my head, drinking water, online dating, skateboarding, wearing socks, being unique, breathing

Views

Political viewsGreen party
ReligionQuaker
Attend religious servicesEvery day
Goal in lifeBecome Bob Marley, Skateboard, Drop a fire album, get my doctorate, socialize, go to college, find an actual dating site, slowly drop into a deep abyss of sorrow until my mind drifts into the void. Sorry, that was #deep x3

Looking For

Must haveBoldness, Oddities, Spontaneity, Money, Power, Flirtatiousness
Look for in a partnerAngry, selfish, orange, communist, large hand (larger gloves), actually a crab, six legs, lays eggs, may or may not eat my brain, sings to me is gospel, knows sign language, natural gatherer, goth, furry, hairy, misogynist, feminist, racist, greenish sometimes? Doesn't have lungs, Troy Bolton (you know who he is), cries a lot, also has doctorate, kernel sanders enthusiast
On the first dateWe are in my car, I light a candle because I'm a rebel and mom won't let me light candles in my car. The candle falls over. The car explodes, killing our parents. We are free. You turn to me and ask why I am not angry that my car exploded and I'm an orphan. I laugh. I tell you we are no longer oppressed by the power structures in place. You look I to my eyes like you completely understand. I take out giant marshmallows and chocolate and gram crackers, and tell you about my newest discovery. I call it "Chocolate melted marshmallow surpise" you love it. And me. You tell me you want smore. We go on a second date to Pizza Hut. You buy my free salad and touch my butt. And then I touch yours. And we skate away I to the sunset. But it's raining. There are dogs running next to us. Probably because they want pizza. I hid the crust in my pockets. We stop at Home Depot. I buy a 2' by 4" and hit you with it. You're bleeding. I don't call the ambulance. You love the pain. It reminds you of your father. you remember what it feels like when your goldfish passed. As I walk away, I steal paint samples and leave them on the ground. It's my calling card. Tinkerbell green-the color of our first born child's eyes. I steal your phone and call your ex. Suck it I say and throw the phone across Home Depot. I carry you to the kitchen area and set you down in one of the sinks. The water doesn't work. I got a bottle of water and bathed you. Your leg is twisted at odd angles. It turns me on. I threw the remaining paint samples on your bare chest and stole the pizza from your pockets. I went to my school and licked a doorknob, screaming about some alien the other day that was named Dale. Flash forward to two years later. You died in Home Depot. I married your sister. We have three children together. I have a shrine of shrimp and pictures of your clothes in my closet. I don't regret anything. Each morning I howl to the sun, hoping you're looking at the same sun too.